No More Playing Small
"We are born with only one obligation–to be completely who we are."
– Mark Nepo, Book of Awakening
During my morning reading, I came across this quote.
What struck me most was the work "completely."
There is no one on this planet like you. You are here because God, the Universe, or whatever you believe thought the world needed the flavor that you provide.
But somewhere along the way, we missed that memo. So instead of walking this earth believing we are the salt of the earth, believing we are the shi*t –not in an arrogant way, but in a there's no one here like me, no one can do what I am here to do kind of way–instead of believing we are rare, precious gifts, we shrink.
We shrink to fit in jobs that demand us to play small.
We shrink to fit in relationships that match the stunted version of ourselves.
We shrink, shrink, shrink.
Until one day, the discomfort of playing small, of not being completely who we are, is too much to bear.
"We are born with only one obligation–to be completely who we are."
I believe you are here, reading this blog, because the discomfort of playing small is wearing you down. You've been out of alignment: how you are spending your time/energy/focus does not align with the greatness of who you are.
The box you are in is too small for all you are meant to bring to this world.
There’s this pull to step out of the box and into what’s next; it feels like the call to freedom.
Then the 'buts' show up.
But what will people say?
Your brain tells you it’s selfish and ungrateful to want more.
But I need this job, this title, this box.
Your brain tells you this change will be unfamiliar, uncomfortable, and it might hurt. No. It will definitely hurt.
But what if I don’t make as much money?
Your brain convinces you that the only way you could possibly make money is by doing the one thing you are doing now.
I swear our brains are trying to kill us.
Here's the deal: There is NOBODY on this planet like you. God/The Universe/whatever decided that you needed to be here. You. So be here. Answer the call. Take up space. You were chosen.
By playing small, by not showing up as your full self, you are giving in to what the world thinks you should be versus all you are meant to be.
By playing small, by not showing up as your full self, you are giving in to what the world thinks you should be versus all you are meant to be.
When we play small, every aspect of our life suffers.
Our job misses out because they don't get our best.
Our children miss out because everything we do is modeling and teaching them how they should be–ouch.
Our partners miss out because you can't love wholeheartedly from a place of smallness.
But you know who misses out the most?
We do.
We miss out on the feeling that comes from being and doing what we are uniquely gifted to do. From living.
That lack of fulfillment...
That emptiness…
That tugging that there must be more…
Yea, that.
That feeling is from not being ourselves completely.
But guess what? Here’s where I shimmy with excitement…
We have the power to be big.
We have everything we need to stand up and to take up space.
To be our whole selves.
So how do we undo years of shrinking?
How do we step out of our smallness and into ourselves “completely”?
We decide to.
We tell our brain, ‘yes, it’s scary, but I want to try.’
Then do it.
This week, I invite you to practice stretching into yourself.
I invite you to stand in front of the mirror, look yourself in the eyes, and say this to yourself:
"There is nobody like me. I am the gift. Me. I am the gift. I am going to show up in full to my life starting with this very moment. This one. Right here. Somebody needs me to show up in full today. That somebody is me. I need me to show up in full today. I will not shrink. I listen to and trust myself. I am the gift. Not some other perfect version of me. Me, right now. I am the gift. I was chosen to be here. I will honor the gift that is my life and be here."
I spoke at a conference for educators and shared the gift with them. Tune in.
Listen at 1.5x speed. Save time without missing the message.
If you are going to live into all that you are meant to be, you have to see yourself as the ultimate gift. You have to see yourself and the life you are living, not the life you think you should be living, the life you have right now as a beautiful part of the gift that is you.
I invite you to notice moments and people who encourage you to feel big, free, your complete self. Note of what you are doing, what those people do to support your bigness in those moments, and say 'thank you.’
I also invite you to notice moments and people who ask/demand/expect you to be anything less than who you are. When you encounter them, say to yourself, "I will not shrink. I will show up in full. What would showing up as myself look like in this situation?"
It will be tough.
Breaking bad habits of mind and replacing them with better ones always is.
And it’s 100% worth it.
You are the gift.
You are the gift.
You are the gift.
You are the gift.
Ready to create more time, space, ease, and abundance in your life?
Take the Unleashed Living Scorecard, and find out where to start.
Aisha Crumbine is a life and leadership coach who works with individuals and organizations–helping them maximize their impact by focusing on their personal development.
Certified Life Coach (iPEC) | Certified Dare to Lead™ Facilitator |International Keynote Speaker
